Monday, October 29, 2007

Bitching, Big Boss etc. ( By Floyd)

Hey, let me tell you first what inspires me to write on this topic.
The other day I was chatting with a friend of mine and he said that he would prefer a girl who is bitchy rather then someone boring....

That led my vichardhara ( thought process) to think about this amazing but negative trait generally attributed to the fairer sex , but no longer so. Bitching , I feel is a way of life in today’s insanely competitive (to be read as materialistic or egoistic) world .

Haven’t you noticed that the biggest bitches or backbiters are the ones calling the shots in any setup?

If these creatures are not the Kings , it is most certain that they are the Kingmakers holding others to ransom. So always a win-win situation for them , no matter what!!!
According to many, bitching and allied backbiting strategies are the surest way to scale the corporate ladder in most , if not all companies and organizations.

When I hear such things as above , I pity the Professor who once told me that in the corporate world , everything is based purely on performance and nothing else could ensure success.
Did the wily old fox mean to include performance in bitching???

Now all the purists out there will argue that despite the above benefits one ends, up with tainted character … MOOH KAALA.

For all those who think so ,think twice !!!

Bitching is not only necessary but also glorified as glamorous and fashionable .Thanks to reality shows like Big Boss . Not only did the slutty female celebs of Big Boss but,also the men took part whole heartedly in the activity. Bitching was no doubt the USP of the show .So much so that the biggest bitches in the show , Rakhi Sawant and Kashmera Shah were given a second lease of life, despite their elimination. Bitching was to Big Boss what Jate Goodie’s racial slurs were to Big Brother…..notorious but glamorous.

Talk show “Koffee with Karan” thrived on the Rapid Fire round , but I thought that, more then rapid ,the answers had to be bitchy to bag the coveted koffee hamper. Not surprising though for a show hosted by K.Jo,who believes in the mantra “controversy creates cash”. He again owns the notorious reputation of being the biggest male bitch , no doubt he is taking men towards feminism by promoting metrosexual ( kindly don’t read as homosexual) trends in his movies.

Moral of the story : Bitching can make you the Big Boss in your area of work and if you can go to higher levels with it , maybe as a celeb, someday you may be invited to “Koffee with Karan”. So keep bitching if that’s your cup of tea.

NOTE: I thank God for not gifting dogs with the ability to surf the net and access my blog . Otherwise, my pet Rusty would surely bite a chunk of flesh off my body,for using the female canine’s name for such a disgraceful activity.

Friday, October 19, 2007

MONEY MATTERS ( BY Floyd)

Hey!!! you there,squinting at the screen to read my article.

ARE YOU CONFUSED ABOUT THE ARTICLE"S TITLE???

If you are intelligent enough you should be utterly confused because it can mean many things.Either i'm going to talk about money related matters or am I asserting that money is of importance?...thus saying that money does matter.

However thats not all my friend,it could also be the case that in the hurry of delivering this article I forget to append a sickle(sorry,i meant question mark) to the title.That would make it sound quite a query and would make me appear a confused soul.

Talking about queries ,i wonder if all queries arise out of confusion.In the same breath, i realise that queries also come out of complete ignorance.The possibility of ignorance-induced queries is rare though because of our over-inflated egos.Ego?.....oh my God how can i ignore queries put forth with ego to let down others.'Queries' are also something that haunted me last year since they were part of my engineering syllabus and remind me of that subject called DBMS (Database Management Systems) of which they were
part of.(database querying deals with searching,adding and performing other operations on computer databases).The funniest part of the lectures covering the topic of queries was the fact that they ended with so many queries about queries.Whether those queries were satisfactorily answered was again a debatable query and so was the result for that paper.

The above para if read aloud would sound quite like a tongue twister.Now,I have a query to all of you who might be Guiness Record freaks>>> Do i get a Guiness record for max use of the word 'query' in a single para?? or atleast a LImca record??.

Jokes apart, coming back to the menacing title, I would like to point out that a hatrick of exclamatory marks after the title (MONEYMATTERS!!!) would have made it look like a revelation from a man enlightened,akin to EUREKA!!! by Archimedes, the Greek Scientist.Thats because all people do not realise the worth of money.

This title has indeed been very consuming of our energies , i need a break.My apologies for speculating the title of the topic but not discussing the topic .Frankly speaking ,i dont think money matters and i dont believe it worth to discuss money matters,but things do change and maybe in the future i may write something sensible to do with money ( or atleast something that earns me some money).Till then,your suggestions regarding other possible interpretations of the title are welcome .........Adieu